The sun peeks into my room from behind my curtains and tells the tale of morning’s arrival. I listen for my children but am met with the relief of silence. I take a deep breath, stretch my arms to the sky, and silently think to myself, “It’s going to be a perfect day.”
This is the first beautiful lie I tell myself.
As the day wears on, I continue to repeat beautiful lies to myself.
“Today things are going to run smoothly.”
A beautiful lie followed by tears over spilled milk and wrestling with diapers. A lie followed by colouring on the furniture, messes on fresh clothes, and jam in clean hair.
“Today I am going to be Supermom.”
A beautiful lie followed by forgotten play dates, mismatched socks, and sips of cold coffee. A lie followed by running late, and running on empty.
“Today is going to be productive.”
A beautiful lie followed by forgotten laundry, piles of dirty dishes, and molding food in the fridge. A lie followed by sticky floors, unmade beds, and filmy bathrooms.
“Today is going to be calm and quiet.”
A beautiful lie followed by temper tantrums and time-outs. A lie followed by rambunctious play, flying objects, unexpected guests, and general chaos.
“Today we are going to get some sleep.”
A beautiful lie followed by nightmares, fevers, and extra kids in bed. A lie followed by late night feedings, multiple drink requests, and “just one more story”.
My days are filled with beautiful lies that I repeat to myself over and over again.
I tell myself these beautiful lies to maintain a sense of positivity in the midst of chaos. I tell myself these beautiful lies as a survival tactic to get through the day. But most of all, I tell myself these beautiful lies because of the glimmers of truth that exist in each beautiful lie.
There are moments in the day that run smoothly.
Anytime I arrive punctual to an activity. When we are able to sit together as a family for a meal. When the kids have a bath and smell squeaky clean.
There are moments in the day when I feel like Supermom.
When I prepare a meal that is not from a box. When I am able to shower and enjoy a hot-ish cup of coffee. When the dishes get done by the end of the day.
There are moments in the day that are productive.
When the baby rolls over for the first time. When the toddler learns a new word. When a grocery run occurs with no meltdowns.
There are moments in the day that are calm and quiet.
When the baby falls asleep in my arms. When the little one crawls onto my lap and snuggles in.
There are moments in the day when we get some sleep.
When we nod off during the kids tv shows. When the kids nap for a few glorious minutes simultaneously.
I will continue repeating these beautiful lies to myself every day.
They get me from one day to the next. They fuel me when the days are long and when parenting gets hard. But mostly they remind me of those little moments, when the glimmers of truth shine bright.